Category: Humor

Hysterical Chimerical Dream

Sailing slowly through this hysterical, chimerical dream
Where everything is turned upside-down and inside-out,
With one long, loud shout against the banality of reality,
Forcing sun to rise at night and moon by light of the day
In the same way as ocean tides are reversed,
And chimeras ride so high in the bluest sky,
And pygmies stand tall while giants fall in valley halls,
And eagles swim and horses skim the vault of heaven
Without any fault of natural inability or immutability,
Where crocodiles are tamed into docility
With perfect facility to play through day,
And hares are none stranger for posing great danger,
While buffalo roam across Artic dome which is home
To butterflies, felines, all fine wines and porcupines,
While green grass grows atop mountains
Of honey fountains no money could buy,
And all of this is why we sigh, burn against a return
To the flipside where we were born and must abide;
So ring the bell and fare-thee-well to haunting spell;
Who can tell what joy was there
In the fair land so very far away?

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To the Edge of the Cosmos and Beyond

Can’t you see the stars falling? Can’t you hear the angels calling?
Absolutely enthralling to be at the edge of the Cosmos, to touch
The universal hedge; to go beyond, so near the end, my friend.
And we can dance in the sun, party spun, and never be burned
Nor ever turned away from the cacophony of celestial symphony,
With comets playing drums on the moon; too soon to cry or die!
The party’s just begun … at the edge of the Cosmos and beyond.

Can’t you hear the clouds hissing?  And see the dæmons pissing?
And what a wonderful world, indeed; hurled through space and time,
And we ain’t got a dime for the boreal jukebox, auroral machine
Making music; an oral reminder to the asteroids not to quarrel,
And we get to dance, you know! And prance on moonlight beams,
And streams of sunshine, while we dream all our dreams — cream
Of active imaginations that never grew up, but forever grew out…

To the edge of the Cosmos and beyond…

Note: This light hearted, somewhat humorous poem was first published in December 2015, now being republished for (hopefully) the enjoyment of many new reader-followers. Blessings to one and all!

Big Fish in a Small Pond

He’s a big fish in a small pond, swimming proudly and loudly;
He’s critically acclaimed, you know? Well, if not, he’ll show you!
He’ll walk you down his promenade with his trifling accolades
So you’ll be sure that he’s really somebody after this grand tour;
And if he offers you a tidbit of his talent, you should sit in awe
And return many thankings else he’ll give you a good spanking;
If only you knew, he’s been published and received his reviews!
What does it matter if the sea knows not that he even exists?
He has his small pond, you see, and so he persists as a big fish,
And will dish out his importance to all of the minnows around
With boundless pride and arrogance . . .
But will anyone know when he has died?
He’s a big fish in a small pond, swimming proudly and loudly!
Just a big fish in a small pond, swimming proudly and loudly!

Get Messy and Dance!

Reality can be a real drag
While all the details nag
And folks wag the tongues
And you have to zig-zag
But you still lag behind
With ne’er reason to brag

Well, then . . . get messy and dance!
Whirl and twirl, prance and dance!
Just get downright goofy ‘n dance!

Just take that break
For your own sake
And have some cake
Along with the steak
And add a shake, too!
Just don’t you be blue!

Now, then . . . get messy and dance!
Whirl and twirl, prance and dance!
Just get downright goofy ‘n dance!

Yeah! Be messy ‘n goofy and dance!

Note: For this joyful, playful piece I thank my blogger friend, Tanya, specifically her most recent blog, “Oh my. . .”

Crack of the Head

You chew through the wall of sanity
To try to fit in with an insane world;
Is crazy the norm? Bizarre the new form?
Is upside down, inside out now the way
Of the day? Has all sense gone astray?
You see the moon rise in the morning
So soon after night as some warning:
Our sun has retired, all light expired,
And all of the stars have taken flight,
And the planets have changed places
Altered their faces, slowed their paces
In the new glow of a wild cosmic show,
And you wonder if you’re the only one
Who’s noticed as you blunder through
An altogether outrageous existence
In persistent search of just one church
Of reality only to hear the banshee
Scream by the black tree as she holds
In her gnarled left hand the latchkey
To the cathedral with the upside-down
Steeple . . . and you now have to wonder
If cracking your head, landing you in bed
Has anything to do with the new world
To which you are bound all around you?
Or perhaps the fall was all you needed
In order to notice how bogus the cosmos
Was in which you thought you lived . . . ?

Just Sucking Oxygen

He’s made his excursion and enough exertion for the day;
Yeah, you can bet he broke a sweat, so now he’s here to stay;
After one hour of exercise at the gym, it’s time to hit the shower,
Then he’ll put on his nighty-tighties and t-shirt, though it’s mid-day,
Plop down to play the T.V. while consuming colas and chocolate granolas;
After awhile he’ll whine and grump at his fine, hard working wife
Because he’s bored and needs to score a few points in argument
To augment his rather bland existence in which he insists to persist…
And really, Mother Earth must practically taste the waste of oxygen!
(Did I just say that?) But couldn’t our fair planet better use the air?
(Did I just ask that, too? Miserere mei, Deus!) 

Hail the President: A Lemrick

Here come Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum,
Sound the trumpets and beat the drums,
And the President will be who?
Neither one can fill the shoe,
So just laugh and cry while Nero strums!

Note: A limerick is a humorous poem consisting of five lines. The first, second, and fifth lines must have seven to ten syllables while rhyming and having the same verbal rhythm. The third and fourth lines only have to have five to seven syllables, and have to rhyme with each other and have the same rhythm