Memory Bench, Accusing Board

Lying deep in dark forest keep is the bench of mocking memories

Holding tightly spellbound, painfully crowned with cursed indignity

In such place of beauty to please, and quiet to put the soul at ease

But the bench brings past to present to quench any delight of sight

And soft sound, so now drowned in melancholy that all seems drear

Far and near, as sleep steals over one who can no more see nor hear

And cheer is forbidden in accusing dreams, cream of hell’s theme

On Memory Bench, stench of regrets screaming from Accusing Board

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Fair Weather Friend: Almost Surreal

Only friend when convenient, never decent enough to please anyone else

Trapped in self-servitude, drinking the poison of crude self-centeredness

Awash in your own fears, tears and a built-up paranoia from many years

With no ears to hear the cries of another, to be bothered with fellow man

But only to make demands grown from the rotten soil of base expectation

In a self-created damnation you do not even realize, so blind your heart,

And who can cure your blighted soul, when you see only your own part,

And how to start living again after being dead to life around you so long,

Or to stir your spirit to feel some pick of pain for another desperate man

When long gone has been any sense of empathy twixt you and humanity?

Yes, you are the quintessential fair-weather friend … which is no friend

So Close Yet So Far Away

So sad to be so close yet so far away, only one phone call

And we had to say goodbye, then cry, then again to fall

While still uncertain who would bring the curtain down

To cause another frown on my face at your unsure pace

In leaving with an intention of staying gone long enough

But now what are we to do when too few days remain

And the rain keeps falling and washing away my hoping

And my longing to belong to you yet again even in sin

Because you just mean that much to me ever to be free

But you simply will not pick up the phone to call home

And so I’m alone and weary, so close yet so far away

Unworthy … So They Say

Painful pronouncements dripping with sarcasm in personal condemnation

That my ears hear as fear someone may accept me with no payment plan

Despite years of reckless living while yearning for sublime love divine

In free gift given that they never imagine could be given to the likes of me

So they say not even Jesus will smile at me today in any affectionate way

Nor will the Prince of Peace grant peace to some ugly pauper so improper

And ask if such an undignified creature could expect proper acceptance 

In proper society with an eye to fly high above worldly din of confusion

Within the safe seclusion of the beating heart of the living life of heaven

And can such judgment be born as my heart is torn to bloody fragments

As the whole weight of guilt weighs me down just outside the gates of hell?

Abandonment

I knew before now I’d have to let you go,

Say good-bye, heave an anguished sigh,

Yet never imagined picking up the pieces

Of this torn lease on life so rife with pain

And suffering in torment of loneliness,

With sanguine platitudes in false attitude

Of assurance of better days still in store,

Though your eyes tore my heart in two

When at last you proved to be so untrue

To love, loyalty and the dignified royalty

Of your right-born, high-heavenly nature

Now lying like dark blood soaked cloak 

Discarded old and worn on earthen floor